I’m not one for New Year’s resolutions. I’m just not going to quit smoking and start exercising because it’s another year closer to the end of my world. Nope, I’m young and immortal damn it — so screw that stupid idea. I’ll think about that stuff when I need to worry about gray hair, high blood pressure and perimenopause.
But I have been saying that I would quit before I turn 40 — and despite the fact that I was born around the time same time as John Travolta strutted his fine self around the illuminated dance floor and Alicia Bridges was singing about the nightlife on the Disco ‘Round (what on earth does that mean anyway?) — I think it’s time thought about getting myself into some shape and adopting a healthy lifestyle.
I want to wear a pair of True Religion jeans (are they still in style?) before I really look like some cougar hellbent on hanging on to her faded youth by wearing jeans designed for teen-aged bodies.
I am not ready for my Mom-jeans phase. I’m ready to have abs like Janet Jackson — who is older than me for the record — I just need to tap into my inner power and find a decent exercise outfit.
So these are my resolutions:
1. Tap into my inner power.
2. Find a pleasing exercise outfit.